Divine Timing

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This time last year I was glowing in excitement as I was ready to embark on new life formed within my womb. The general rule is what? Keep quiet n wait til after 12 wks or something but mine is 5 months-no rhyme or reason tho. It’s just something I prefer to keep between the party involved n a few I carefully choose to share with until I feel like making an announcement. Speaking on a loss isn’t an easy feat to do. We normally keep it to ourselves becuz we feel nobody would understand but you’d be surprised with how many relate. Being preggers at 25 is a whole different ball game than anything after 35 as I was able to pay more attention and appreciate the changes within my body this time around. I’ve never had morning sickness but dmn it if heartburn didn’t take me out.




I admire women who share their stories of miscarriage (MC) aloud because nobody talks about it. You can find solace in someone u relate to for support. It’s almost like it’s a taboo topic but more so it opens u up to being vulnerable n judged. Do I share? How do I share? What do I share? Do I really feel like reliving it by explaining the shyt all over again? Ugh! I felt like how can I not esp if I wanted to later share a success story. I go from being so excited which was different for me becuz of all the previous ones it was like “oh shyt-wtf now” to oh nooooo. FINALLY I get pregnant on purpose with a purpose n it’s snatched from me. I felt like it was karma for taking for granted all the other times of it easily being handed to me n tossed like eeeh maybe next time becuz I know for sure I have a whole Josephine Baker rainbow tribe waiting on me at the pearly gates (don’t judge me). Yet I have no problem taking full responsibility for my choices and I don’t regret em. I’ve been a work in progress for some years now n made peace with a lot of past indiscretions honey. That’s why I’m such a beast today becuz I’m very aware of myself. After being on bedrest for weeks at a time my water broke too early n the end result was a miscarriage-THANK GOD I did have folks check on me as well as give me my space. Getting my body back into sync wasn’t easy becuz it still processed a baby being delivered. I gradually went back to work to resume my regularly scheduled programming but it was tough cuz it randomly crossed my mind n I’d be done for the day n retreat back into hiding. Slowly but surely I came back into normalcy and regained a sense of brighter days.




Many have asked if we’ll try again. I feel optimistic so why not. There are plenty rainbow babies amongst us and your probably one urself. If it was anything that would put my life in jeopardy-NO n since my doctor gave us the green light, it’s all I needed! For those who are trying-keep goin IF ur psychy allows becuz I can’t imagine going thru the devastation of an MC back to back n then u feel like u walkin on eggshells in hopes of-ya know, so it takes a toll on ur body n mental state. Just think, if women gave up after the first try or loss the population would prolly be half. It’s all in divine timing n whenever it’s meant to be soooo let me set boundaries now: do NOT ask me every month if I’m pregnant-it’s phkn annoying. I can see the reason why people keep shyt under wraps n private #HiKylie yet I know people have the best intentions and want to see us win…still it’s annoying! Even if and when it does happen I would do things a lot different the next go round like…not give a due date. Nothing else more annoying than u asking within those upcoming weeks “Is it here yet” n yall know I got a smart mouf so u ask me on the wrong day/time u will get ur feelings hurt. Please believe I’m not hardly press for the attention so depending on how u could perceive and receive this message it might translate to: ur on a need to know basis! It’s not to be mean n I don’t wanna sound bytchy but I am now VERY picky with who I share my energy (n self) with (even tho I am sharing it on this platform). I know how fake some folks can be as well as nosey so for something as important as this, I only want genuine people on my team. Whether that’s 2 people or 20, I prefer the quality over quantity any day. Thank you for ur words of encouragement, well wishes n prayers, they definitely don't go unnoticed and much appreciated. I'm open to receiving my blessings :)



Smooches

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Top 5 Series: Intro

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As promised i'll be doing my Top 5 series but I wanted this post to be a little disclaimer before I hopped into it. My top 5's will consist of anything from celebs, anything beauty, places to eat or shop-yall know I'm random. My first one will be high end makeup. Years ago when I came into the game, I started off with drugstore and graduated from there. My foundations and concealers came from makeup counters because I didn't know how to blindly match myself. Sephora and Mac were my besties esp Mac and I built a great relationship with them so I didn't have to clamor n wait in line for limited edition items that sold out asap (oh hi rihanna collection). While I joined makeup forums to keep up with "what's next" I didn't have any interest in trying high end becuz the price alone scared me. Like dmnnnn who in they right mind would pay $20+ for a lipstick (lippie) or $50+ on foundation. That's absurd. As I became more comfortable in the makeup world I still stayed within my lane of the Mac price range n a splurge for me was NARS.




One day I'm leaving out of nordies minding my business when this lady pulled me to try Dior. Why I didn't keep goin-I don't know but she paired a lippie n lip glow (balm) on me n it was like putting on the hat to Frosty the snowman. HAPPY BIRTHDAY-I came to life. I didn't take the lippie but the lip glow I knew I couldn't leave it behind n didn't care it was a whopping $34. I consistently use it n rebuy every 3-4 months so it's well justified now. 

Confession: Jumping into the high life I felt bad becuz those who aren't makeup junkies don't quite understand and u are then judged with the "u spent how much...on what" and the "u crazy" along with "such n such is cheaper" so I remained underground with my fellow makeup sisters on forums who embraced my newfound love n didn't judge.



As I became more open minded with trying high end I made sure I researched it first. I looked up swatches and reviews which I rely on if it's not at the counters. Makeup is trial n error. Yes, there are peasantry cheaper options n brands but I like what I like n don't apologize for it. It's not for everybody. The same way guys spend hundreds on Jordan's is the same way I might spend at Sephora. My makeup stash is my therapy n that I enjoy. That's that. I am fully out the closet now n not ashamed! I can easily walk out the house with a $300 face (which is why MUA's shouldn't short themselves n clients should appreciate the charge). Now...just becuz it's of high end doesn't mean it's better than. I have had some high end brands that were trash. There are also high end brands that don't necessarily cater to women of color (woc) shades. I am now to the point where I am picky with my brands becuz I know what works for ME. I also shop for it when my pocket allows so I'm smarter to shop during sale times to soften the blow. 




Treat cho' self-within reason. I have a habit of trying things in two's which is dangerous at these dmn prices. If u are interested in making the plunge, search youtube, beauty blogs n reviews. My reviews will not be politically correct. I can tell u right now, I'm not doing no list of ingredients, how many ounces in a product, what sweat shop the labels were made in or none of that. Imma keep it simple: price n if it's worth grabbing or not. I will say there aren't a lot of swatches for woc's pass my shade. I scoured the internet all night one time lookin for Tom Ford swatches n when I did find ONE her lighting wasn't great :( If u got a gift card laying around-go for it. Sephora has fall n spring sales with 15-20% off n that's when I mainly stock up-but again no pressure. I can't even remember the last time I've brought a Mac lippie but my last one was Guerlain-OMG!!! Now THAT is a brand that's worth it on or off a sale. 

Ok Top 5 High End Lippies...comin up...

Smooches

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Royal Wedding 2018

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The royal wedding shall commence this Saturday and I am soooo excited AS IF i'm attending myself. Well I mean I did have to turn down my RSVP due to scheduling conflicts-don't cha hate that. So this week I made myself The Duchess to get everyone in the royal spirit. I love how my co-workers just get me. They know I am outside of the box so they appreciate my themes. Plus I just think it's fun to break up the boring, everyday attire n pep it up.

Theme: Fascinators

The last royal wedding I watched was Prince William n Kate in 2011. I was so enamored by the guest arriving dolling such beautiful n dramatic head pieces. Just watching them so gracefully walking into the chapel and the thousands of bystanders there to catch a glimpse of the party, how can u not fall into the hype. I know us on this side of the pond are excited that Meg's broke all the stereotypical norms of the royal families history n I found it interesting in how Queen Elizabeth had to give them permission to wed. How crazy is that-for us American's n what if we had adopted that same "law". So in my best British accent I've been donning them with the slang in which they fancied. My attire for the week was the 'bees knees' as I too wore fascinators or fancy hats. It's been rainy all week in the DMV :( but I managed to have my Paki bae, Sunny snap me!

Fun Fact: The white wedding dress tradition started from Queen Victoria who married Prince Albert in 1840.

Fun Fact: Princess was the first royal bride to omit "obey" from her nuptials and although Prince Charles will walk her down the aisle he will NOT give her away! (Girl Power huh)

Fun Fact: Meghan is actually the oldest royal bride at 36 (well dmn) annnd she's actually gonna break the rules n do a speech at the reception **gasp**


After the wedding, she will officially be known as Her Royal Highness. As we grow up watching fairytales n anxiously awaiting Prince Charming to come swooping us off our feet on a white horse, they are actually livin it over there. Can you imagine having to give up ur American ways to conform to the UK lifestyle n rules? Give up ur privacy, voice on social media, twerking in public wit ur tongue hangin out, replacing curse words with bloody...living in such a bubble where in public ur in a fish bowl or the pony show, and hiding emotions. I just want to be a fly on the wall when Harry asked his grandma for permission knowing she is half black, divorcee n comes no where near the bloodline of a 'toff' but a mere commoner-BLIMEY **drops tea n crumpets** The wedding starts at 4am on this side of the pond. I can't promise I'll be up but it'll definitely be on repeat I'm sure. I'm excited to see the fashions of course and just enjoy the overall hype. I feel like they really love each other and for him to be so cheeky n take a chance going against the monarchy grain has to be commended. Times are definitely changing and there is nothing out of reach when u go for it. Talk about taking life by the 'bullocks' (balls) aye! #RoyalRebels <3

Smooches




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Life Hack: Caftans

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Caftan life is the best. They are so versatile. I prefer to wear mine freely but if I wanted to flaunt the waist line (or lack of  haha) I'd toss on a belt. They are easy breezy n totally doable day or night. I fell in love with them a few years ago and I initially got my first one as a house dress. More than likely...I got it from my grandma's closet. Now I've watched them blossom into a trend. Since then I've accumulated a good handful of em. One of my pet peeves: women who walk out the house in their pajamas and/or scarf **cringe** I don't care how much of a rush we in, we can always take an extra 10 secs to throw on some presentable attire. I don't care if u gotta throw on the jeans u just had on yesterday. Makin a dash to the store as if u literally woke up, grabbed ur keys n jetted looks STANK! 

my mama always saaaaid: Take pride in urself and look presentable before u walk out the house. Ya never know who u gonna bump in to. 

As much as I would loooove to sashay n walk the aisles of wegman's in a sequin dress with a sweeping long train for my Sat morning runs...I.Am.Not. I throw on my caftan n go. I even live on the edge sometimes n go without under garments **gasp** so naughty (beware of the gust of wind from the doors opening as u enter the store tho, I've had a few Marilyn Monroe moments myself). The fact I can turn this one piece into day, night or night-night is FAB!


I feel like such a goddess as it drapes the body n just flows. Like I said...at home I basically live in these. I'm actually surprised I don't see more women (other than modest cultures) wearing them OUT becuz the best part about it is-NO SPANX required lol I normally get mine from my thrifting honies or department stores like Ross, TJ Maxx n etc. I do not spend a fortune on them so I keep it reasonable when grabbing some.

caftan from my grandma's closet
caftan n belt from IG @trashismytreasure
Lounging at home I'm free to wear how I feel which is bare under there 10 out of 10. When I have my caftan week at work I will be wearing under garments because some of them can be of thinner material n depending how some are made u can see side boobage when u lift ur arm. Imma LaaayDee! So yes, keeping in the spirit of ELEVATION 2018, u heaux have options before u leave the house lookin so unkept n u would spend more energy walking towards the door than throwin on this WHAM BAM-thank u ma'am one piece mmmm k. 


Gawn head n give them body con dresses a break. U know u be self-conscious in them joints wondering if u stop n grab a bite to eat them rolls gonna seep thru like a semi-busted can of biscuits anyways. Fashion Nova ain't goin nowhere honey lol. If ur ready to jet set to enjoy the beach or a relax on a cruise, these should definitely be an option. I'm more of a carry on only kinda gal so these are perfect and space savers. So just know I am well equipped with these pretty lightweight garments of loooove and I'll be in 'em often whether I'm poolside, couch side, and outside!! 

Smooches





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